The Aftermath
by Entire Oranges
Summary: AU story taking place after everything with Alie and the City Of Light. Abby deals with an unexpected aftermath from the events.
1. Chapter 1

"Abby do you have a moment?" She smiles at her patient holding up her finger to indicate she'd return in one moment, he smiles in return nodding for her to go. Abby gives Jackson a glare; he knew it would take at least a week to examine all Arkadians that had taken the chip and survived (happily that was 98%) there wasn't time for interruptions and being stolen away for even a moment. He looks away sheepishly before he mouthed sorry. She relaxes a bit…it was Jackson after all she trusted him.

"What is it Jackson?" They had stepped into the room she claimed as her office though it was more fitting as a closet. He is holding in his hand a clipboard with some papers attached. Before he shifts out of her view she spied her name Griffin, Abigail on the top corner. The relaxation feeling seizes. Her test and lab work she too was included in those examinations. With memories being shoddy, pieces missing while under the influence of ALIE it was the safest course. But so far the worst things found included badly healing (or healed) broken bones. Abby knew she didn't suffer any injury such as that. Jackson's face now shifts as well too a deep sadness.

"I'm the only one who knows." She didn't like that beginning.

"Please Jackson. Tell me."

"Abby you're…."

"Jackson please." She repeats reaching over placing a hand on his shoulder. He takes a big breath.

"Abby you're pregnant." With that her knees forget how to work and before Jackson can react she crumbles to the ground sobbing.

"Oh God…Marcus…" She chokes out, pushing away Jackson as he tries to comfort her.

"I'm so sorry Abby."


	2. Chapter 2

This wasn't the first time she held this in her hands. Countless times as a doctor with little emotion given as she passed it over, watched the woman (sadly sometimes the girl) take the liquid all in one swallow, their hands often shaking as the cup is set back down as Abby tried to ignore the threat of their tears. It was life on the Ark, the limit of life so more could survive.

Abby had also consumed it twice before. The first time she and Jake had only been joined as man and wife for month, if that, when they received the news. There had been no joy and celebration. It was too soon they had too many plans and goals to reach. A child was in their cards just not that child. Abby barely flinched emotionally speaking as she had drunk the death.

The second time was different, that one did hurt. Clarke was five years old, a dream for them both, and there was an old fashion accident and a sibling was conceived. Abby imagined another one though she knew it could never be. Still seeing the possible out come in front of you smiling, laughing, saying I love you mommy it hurt, bad. The Exodus Charter gave the answer. She cried herself to sleep that night and made Jake finally get the vasectomy he kept holding off with weak excuses.

She knew it had to be done. It was not only the right choice it was really the only choice. She had no right to want this child, she had no memory of its conception besides little flashes of memories that held nothing for her. This was a child of a double rape essentially, she had no right to want this. Still Abby only is able to stare at the liquid unable to pick it up.

"Arg!" She screams the cup no longer on the desk but now running down the wall of her quarters. She couldn't shake the feeling this was wrong. There was so much suffering from the journey to City Of Light the idea of something positive happening held a small comfort. And it was Marcus's…or at least she grasping on that hope.

Before Abby had Jake to talk to. Able to lean on him, had his shoulder to cry on. This time there was no one. Jackson only but he didn't need to know of this struggle, nothing he could say would be able to help. She trusted him if she did pour another dose and consumed it instead of throwing it he would never share what he knew.

Her hand rests on her flat stomach, tears welling up. "I'm sorry." She had to do it. Like that second time she'd adjust to the pain and lose. Abby stands up taking a second to compose herself before exiting and heading to the hospital section where more the solution awaited.


	3. Chapter 3

**7 months later.**

"Abby put that down!" Raven yells hobbling her way over as quick as she could manage.

"Its not heavy. I'm fine."

"Stop being stubborn no one in your position should be moving a stack of papers let alone these boxes. Hey Jasper! Monty!" The two young men look across the room and immediately put together what was being asked of them.

"Thank you. Really though it was fine."

"Just doing what Jackson requested."

"Treating me like an infantile?" Abby mutters.

"No. Making sure you, both of you are safe. We all care about you. Now please take it easy."

"Yeah Dr. Griffin if you need anything don't hesitate!" Jasper joins the conversation with Monty nodding eagerly.

"Again thank you. Now I really should get back to work." The three of them watch as Abby waddles off, the unseen baby kicking up a storm. She swore this kid never stopped moving. Kicking, flipping, doing what felt like somersaults. It was cute for a period, now she was tired of it.

"You can calm down. Don't make me regret not taking the mixture when I could have." Abby immediately felt guilty even though she knew her child couldn't hear or understand it; still the shame filled her heart. She flashes back to that evening. Another cup was filled. More staring. Debating and self doubt over the right decision. Knowing despite her previous conviction there wasn't a true right choice. Something told her not to drink, not to end the life.

"Ow! Seriously that's enough!" She says with relaxed laughter that time. "I can already see you're gonna be stubborn as hell. Don't worry I've dealt with your sister I can handle whatever you dish out." Clarke had been the first person she told. Nearly a month after she had learned and made the decision to keep it. Her eldest having been away at Polis helping Luna adjust to her new reluctant role as Commander and help with their aftermath of ALIE's destruction.

When they finally had a few minutes and the news was shared there were tears from both women…neither being from anger. That had been Abby's biggest fear. Or one of them. The other fear Abby knew might never see the light of day and in a way that was a fear too.


	4. Chapter 4

"Say bye to daddy." Abby says a soothing voice squeezing gently the little hand that held onto hers.

"Buh bye dada." The words were said as requested, though if the meaning was understood Abby had her doubts; she did each time they came here. It used to be daily visits, even multiple times a day. She needed to feel close to him even if it were a limited one sided closeness. It brought her comfort and that's all she needed. Then time and life or life with a growing infant stole away the daily visits. She had to move on. They both had too. This had been the longest extension between journeys here; three weeks.

"Morning Dr. Griffin." Abby looks over and smiles softy. Amelia Winters lost her son just four days ago in a shooting incident. She is fiddling with some flowers almost absentmindedly. Abby knew what that was like.

"Morning. How are you?" She regrets the words.

"Fine. Good. Better?" They both can't help but to laugh at the struggle of trying to find the right lie.

"Down!" The youngest becomes vocal and kicks for good meature. Abby tightens her hold.

"They sure do get big quite quick don't they?' Abby knows Amelia flashing to memories of her child, trying to hold it together. 'I should leave you three alone."

"It's okay. Did you need anything?"

"It can wait. Sorry I interrupted you." She rushes out. Abby assumes part of guilt of walking in on the assumingly private family affair and part trying to remain strong not wanting witnesses when she broke.

"I want down."

"Fine.' Abby leans down and places her child down. 'Happy?" No answer is given but the steady woobly walking, a task just discovered, with a grin gave the answer. She stands there watching and taking it in. This child, this beautiful, intelligent child, the one she for a few moments didn't want. The one that shouldn't exist in every imaginable way. The second greatest blessing of her life. Who had a birthday…the big one, the first in eight days. Abby knew some were planning a little party, at least Abby hoped it was little. Though with this angel she won't mind too mu…

"Dada." Abby thoughts are jumped back as she watches a set of hands yanking on the bed. She rushes over picking them up and met by screams.

"It's okay. It's okay."

"Dada!" It is breaking her heart.

"Do you want to give daddy a kiss?' A sniffle and a nod. Abby shifts her weight in her arms and leans them over to give the kiss. 'Good job! That was really sweet."

"Seepin?"

"Yes daddy is sleeping."

"Wake up." The tears start to sting. The innocence of the statement. Her willing to give almost anything to have him wake from this coma and be fine. As a doctor Abby knew the chances of that reality kept slipping further and further away.

"Maybe soon. Come on it's time to get breakfast." She pauses for a second to brush a stray piece of hair off of Marcus's forehead. 'You really do need to wake up. I need you. We need you." She whispers.


End file.
